Leadership - The Art of Speaking Last

JJ Bussert | 09/25/2024

Have you ever noticed how the dynamics of a meeting shift when the most senior person speaks first? Conversations narrow, diverse ideas fade, and the collective potential of the team diminishes. In leadership, sometimes the most impactful action is not speaking at all-at least not until everyone else has. Inspired by Nelson Mandela's wisdom, Simon Sinek's insights, and the core tenets of Agile, let's explore how the simple act of speaking last can transform your team's collaboration and unlock hidden solutions.

In the fast-paced world of consulting and software development, I've found myself in countless retrospectives and team meetings, often grappling with the instinct to be the first to offer solutions or opinions. It's a common scenario: a project is veering off track, deadlines loom ominously, and a team of individuals-some new, some seasoned-are still learning how to sync their efforts. In these high-pressure situations, the urge to jump in and steer the conversation can be overwhelming.

Recently, I watched a talk by Simon Sinek titled Speak Last, Lead Best, where he reflects on Nelson Mandela's approach to leadership. Sinek recounts how Mandela, when asked about his leadership style, attributed it to lessons from his father, a tribal chief who always spoke last in meetings. This practice wasn't about asserting authority; it was about giving others the space to share their thoughts openly, without the shadow of the leader's opinion influencing them.

This resonated deeply with me, especially within the context of Agile methodologies. One of the key goals of Agile is to create a safe environment where the entire team feels empowered to voice their opinions and concerns. As leaders, we must be cautious not to inadvertently stifle this openness by talking too much, speaking over others, or failing to encourage participation.

Creating Space for Authentic Dialogue in Agile Teams

When a leader voices their opinion first, it can inadvertently set a tone that discourages dissenting views. Team members might align their thoughts with the leader's perspective, consciously or subconsciously, to avoid conflict or to gain favor. This phenomenon can stifle creativity and hinder the team's ability to identify and solve underlying issues-contradicting the very essence of Agile collaboration.

By holding back our own opinions, we create a safe environment where team members feel valued and heard. This approach aligns perfectly with Agile principles, which emphasize individuals and interactions over processes and tools. It allows us to:

  • Uncover Hidden Insights: Team members might have noticed nuances or problems that aren't immediately apparent to us. Their frontline experiences can provide valuable context.
  • Foster Ownership and Accountability: When individuals contribute to the problem-solving process, they're more likely to take ownership of the solutions.
  • Build Trust and Collaboration: Demonstrating that we value everyone's input strengthens team cohesion and trust, essential components of a successful Agile team.

The Challenge of Remaining Unbiased

One of the toughest aspects of speaking last is doing so without projecting our opinions through body language or tone. It's not just about the words we withhold; it's about genuinely listening with an open mind.

In Agile environments, psychological safety is paramount. Team members should feel comfortable sharing ideas without fear of criticism or repercussions. There have been times when I was certain I knew the root cause of a project's struggles. Yet, by consciously choosing to listen first, I discovered factors I hadn't considered-be it a miscommunicated priority, an overlooked dependency, or a team member's personal challenge affecting their work.

It's essential to approach these discussions with humility. We might think we've made key performance indicators clear, but if the team isn't aligning with them, perhaps our communication wasn't as effective as we believed. Speaking last gives us the opportunity to identify these gaps and reinforces the Agile value of open and honest communication.

Practical Steps to Speak Last in Agile Meetings

  • Prepare to Listen Actively: Enter meetings with the intent to understand, not just to respond. Take notes, ask clarifying questions, and acknowledge contributions.
  • Manage Non-Verbal Cues: Be mindful of facial expressions and body language. Show openness and avoid signals that could indicate judgment or impatience.
  • Encourage Participation: If certain team members are quiet, invite them to share their thoughts. In Agile, every voice matters, and sometimes the most insightful comments come from those who are less vocal.
  • Summarize and Reflect: After everyone has spoken, summarize the key points and reflect them back to the team. This ensures everyone feels heard and confirms your understanding.

Embracing a Culture of Shared Leadership

Adopting the practice of speaking last isn't about relinquishing authority; it's about leveraging the collective intelligence of the team. It's recognizing that leadership isn't a solo endeavor but a collaborative journey-a fundamental principle in Agile methodologies.

In my experience, Agile teams that feel their voices matter are more engaged, motivated, and innovative. They don't just execute tasks; they contribute to the vision and adapt proactively to change.

As leaders, let's take a page from Nelson Mandela's book and the Agile manifesto. Let's create spaces where ideas flourish, where challenges are met with collective strength, and where speaking last becomes a powerful tool for empowerment.

Conclusion

The next time you find yourself in a meeting-especially when tensions are high and the stakes are higher-resist the urge to steer the conversation from the outset. Embrace the silence, listen earnestly, and watch how your team rises to the occasion.

By speaking last, we might just hear the solutions we've been searching for-and in the process, cultivate an Agile team that's resilient, innovative, and deeply connected.


I'd love to hear your thoughts and experiences on this topic. Have you tried speaking last in your Agile team meetings? What impact did it have? Please share your comments below, and let's continue the conversation on fostering effective leadership and collaboration.